Tis the season for good intentions, for setting goals and challenging yourself to be better. But I’ve been known to give quite a lot of side-eye to the whole idea of New Years Resolutions because I think that for the most part they are a trap.
Once a year people try to solve all the things they feel are wrong with their lives at once and then feel shit about themselves when that inevitably does not work.
But then maybe my system of setting constantly evolving To-Dos for myself is not any better. How can I ever get any sense of achievement if the finish-line is always moving further away? There is a definitive answer with the traditional resolutions. Either you lost 10 lbs or you didn’t. Either you quit smoking or not.
Part of my problem with this, as with many things, is the issue of long term mental illness. It can so frequently turn your days into a series of check lists. Get out of bed, take your meds, brush your teeth, drink water, eat three meals composed of more than cheese, smile, breathe, go back to bed before 1am, and when you finally do it all you fall asleep then do it all over again. And again.
When that is every day, overarching goals can seem like a ridiculous luxury. My plans all have to be broken down into bite size pieces before I can act.
But perhaps this January I want a piece of the energy and get into that trap.